"Another dimension"

So I guess it's true. They've been right all along. Nevertheless, I still will not want to hear it in the future. Last night I got nearly 10 hours of sleep...and believe it or not, I was not tired today. Unfortunately, I'll only get about 5 hours tonight. But still a two-night average of 7.5 is very abnormal for me. I think 10 is more than I've had in a very very long time. Possibly years. Probably months and months. I honestly can't remember a time though, because generally when I can sleep in, I stay up really really late. What happened last night was I took a nap on my futon from 11:4o p.m. to 12:10 a.m. and ended up waking up on my futon at 4:25 a.m. At that point, I'd finished a very short night's sleep. Anyway, I went to bed and a history-making night occurred.

Tonight was full of fun and accomplishment. I actually did some homework, but not until I'd watched Arrested Development with Rogers - Sharp - Ricker ate at Blimpies and ran over 3 miles at our friendly wellness center. I also laughed a lot, like I do everyday. Perhaps on my gravestone it will say: "He laughed his way through life."

?Ah, that that might be said of all of us, Eh?

"Waiting over here for life to begin"

The decision that I made on Friday was to stay in Anderson for this weekend. I had pretty much decided by the time I finished typing the entry, but I wasn't completely sure. I believe it was the right decision based on the circumstances. This weekend was an important weekend for me to be home. It was a good weekend. Relaxing. Full of fun and food - lots of ice cream. Good time with Lisa. It was a normal weekend in a lot of ways, which is a good thing. I've been absent of normal weekends for a bit now. Prior to that bit, I had some of the best weekends ever. In short, it's been an internally (and at times externally) emotional few weeks.

Two weeks until I go to Mexico. I am looking forward to traveling. Some of my best memories /experiences have been out of the country. I hope that this trip is memorable. I've written much about Costa Rica in the past - just not in this Blog. Lithuania also was quite an experience. Toronto - wonderful. Somewhere deep inside, I thrive on being alone in a foreign culture as I was in Toronto and Lithuania. Sure surrounded by people, but alone in that I walk and wander as I please. I think, miss, wonder, and experience. I'm grateful to have had these opportunities.

It's almost midterms. It will be over before I know it.

"Stay or leave, I ask you not to go"

Coldplay Rocked.
"Was it better than the last show?"
At worst equal, maybe better.
"What does that mean.?"
The show was close to nearly as good (if not as good), and the circumstances for attending were better.
"But Chris Martin didn't dance around as much."
But he did prance around, and he treated us Louisvilleians to a brand new song.
"Louisvillieans? New song?"
The show was in Kentucky. Yea! The new song was pretty darn good.
"So what's next for you, Berg?"
I don't know. I'm either going to Tennessee to have a kickin time with some very good friends or staying home to have a kickin time with a group of very best friends.
"What's your criteria for deciding?"
Mainly based on feeling. Sometimes I feel like I really should go. Othertimes I don't. I have a couple of hours to decide for sure.
"Why would you want to hang out with good rather than best friends?"
Because I view this trip to Tennessee as irreplacable, whereas I hang out with my best friends every weekend, and will hopefully continue to do so on into the future.
"What does everyone else think?"
Varying opinions on 'what I would be saying' if I went, but suffice it to say that both groups of people really want me to hang out with them (I feel popular) and one group will be disappointed at the decision I make.
"What other factors are there?"
Well one of my good friends who was going to go, is not now (Nate D.) so that may be a sign that I should stay. Also, Lisa and I could definately use the time to hang out with each other. She really wants me to stay. Also, homework, etc.
"Sounds like your decision is easy."
Yes, except for that irreplacable part. I'll be missing out an on opportunity that will / can not be replaced at a later date.
"Sounds like your torn."
Yes.
"What's the right choice?"
Let's hope I make it, whatever it might be.

"Tell me how do you feel?"

"Helllll yeahhhh!" yells Lisa into her telephone, unable to contain her excitement.

"What?!" asks Andrew in confusion at the loudness.

_ Coldplay _ Tomorrow Night _ Louiville, Kentucky _

Who'd of thought there would still be tickets? It is going to rock!

So Ricky, don't feel bad about the movie!

PLUS

= Awesome

"I am my own worst enemy"

I wonder if I will ever reach my breaking point. Tonight I sure felt like I was right there - now a couple of hours later, I don't feel so bad. Here are the things not going so well.

1) Relationship with Lisa - we've just had a rough couple of weeks, a complicated emotional rollercoaster. Hopefully, everything is on the upswing.

2) Schoolwork - Today consisted of staying up until 3 doing homework at the last minute, skipping my first class (and the homework) and forgetting to do the homework for another class. Additionally, I am getting some bad grades (for me) in a couple of classes.

3) SIFE Stuff - Although I am contributing, I am not doing nearly enough for SIFE to keep things moving. It's been challenging.

4) AMG work - AMG is the Anderson Media Group, an eleven member public relations, marketing and design company within the Falls School of Business that I run. I'm way behind in a bunch of things on this front.

5) Relationship with God - notice how this is #5? I'm a sucky Christian. I know this. I want this to change. I lack motivation. God help me.

6) Cussing - Lisa brought it to my attention that I've been cussing more recently. Believe me, I cursed like a sailor over the weekend. Why? No good reason except for almost across the board when I cuss, people approve and even find it funny oftentimes. This may be because I only cuss around the people that approve and find it funny...but there are plenty of them. So that's something I need to improve.

It occurred to me tonight, that Thursday night movies with Ricky & Josh at Applewood is the only consistent thing in my life right now. Everything else seems to be changing in a variety of different ways. Thanks, Ricker!

Time work work/homework. Wish me luck. "Good luck," they reply in unison.

"My heart can go where my heart does belong"

It's 1:30 a.m. I'm at my favorite computer at the Falls School of Business computer lab. I think I was supposed to be kicked out at midnight. No one is around. I just finished my family genealogy. Unfortunately this project did not get as much attention, as I wish I could have given it. Instead I scurried to find as much info as I could. Nevertheless, it is full of facts.

Normally on a Monday night, I would be heading to sleep. But sleep does not call me this evening. Rather creating a family chart, and then a shower, and then maybe (doubtful) some other homework may call me.

Lisa and I went to my parent's house and she played with Noel while I did my homework. Lisa is an amazing Aunt. She loves that little girl and treats her like I never would have imagined Lisa treating children. Noel, in contrast, treats Lisa poorly. She is two though, so she has room to improve. Noel was liberal with her affection tonight when Lisa and I left. I doubt that there is a much better feeling on earth than the displayed love of a little one.

My intramural basketball career came to a close tonight with a terrible first round playoff lost. We the #1 seed lost by about 7. Down seven with 3:30 to go, I maintain that we gave up to early by turing to the foul and chuck 3's strategies. We managed to pull it to within 3, but the other team put in their free throws to seal the deal.

Well I think it's time to leave the FSB as I'm suddenly feeling cold. The Lounge will be nice and toasty. Home sweet home. Home for 3 more months. Then it will be time to create a new Home.

"Do you wish a dance"

Yesterday, I went to the Argosy to celebrate Greg's Birthday. We had a jolly good time. A jolly good time. I lost about $40, which wasn't too much worse than a typical weekend. Nate P. walked away up about $250 after playing Hold 'em. What a guy?

Today I saw Woody Allen's movie Match Point, which I would maintain borrowed liberally from Theodore Dreiser's "An American Tragedy." Thank you high school AP Lit. Good movie. I recommend it. 7.6 out of 10. Enjoyed.

Someone (Jason) once (yesterday) asked me why I end my posts sometimes with Goodnight and Good Luck. Well, I haven't seen the movie titled that, but to me the phrase describes my feelings when I write (usually late at night).

By the time I'm finished, I want to wish my friends a Goodnight - and a Good Luck. Whatever tomorrow holds for you, good luck. Match Point is a movie that has the concept of Luck as its central theme. Personally, I believe that things happen for a reason. When I say Luck, I mean may life treat you well. May you be blessed by God and succeed in your endeavors. When I say goodnight, I mean just that. Whatever the day has held for you, may you rest peacefully. May you sleep well and be blessed. So while I will probably be up for about 4 more hours mostly working on homework I still wish you all a Goodnight...and good luck. Cheers.

"I swear by now I'm playing time against my troubles"

A Friday that looked bad from the outset - no plans, no good ideas, "hopefully Deardorff isn't doing anything" turned out to be pretty good, although I did have to tell Nate, I was busy. Sorry buddy.

While Lisa and I left it yesterday as a break, me taking some time to think things out. Well today Lisa came over and we talked for a bit, and agreed (which I had thought previously) that we should keep spending time together, me still taking time to think things out - this was professional advice by the way.

So what started out with no plans, turned out to be a date night with Rogers. A much better date night than the last (Saturday). We went to Hacienda, hung out for a bit, and then went to see Firewall. I don't think any of the other options could have been better for us on this night. _ No Formal _ No skiing _ No Homecoming _ No normal Friday Night Out - for this night at this time and place we were supposed to have a good, fun night together.

I hope ya'll had just as good an evening. Goodnight, and good luck!

"Sometimes that just about as funky as you can be"

Three points of interest:

The Rainbow Warriors lost their first game of the season by 1 point. My guy scored a bucket - pretty much the first basket that had been scored on me the entire night. I went to help out and the ball was dished to him. In my defense, I had just made two free throws that had given us a 1 point lead with 9 seconds to go. Sunk them both. I was confident, but nervous. I almost won the game for us. Oh well. Playoffs next week.

Point #2. I heard back from the Consulting Company in Indy. Everything looks / sounds positive, except they said it would probably be late March or early April before I go back down there. That may allow me the time to get some other offers on the table though, so that's okay. The good news, is everything still sounds positive.

Point #3. Please keep praying for me and Lisa. Pray specifically for guidance and wisdom. My moment of being unstable is continuing into a full week. Plus I am absolutely destroying the heart and life of the person I love most in the world even more than is necessary, because I am handling the whole thing horribly.

That is the life of Andrew D. Rosenberg on February 16, 2006. Goodnight, and good luck.

"Come dance this silence down through the morning"

The sun splashes down, you retreat, pulling a t-shirt over your eyes, beads of sweat forming on your naked ribs and stomache. You bury your feet a little more in the sand. As you drift to sleep you hear the screams of children in the distance, muffled by the wind moving like the waves, slowly...gently. Your mind teeters between conscious thought and dreaming. It wanders. For one last brief second before plunging over the edge of sleep you realize where you are in life and you are thankful. A smile plays at the edges of your mouth.

"One day at a time"

- Happy Valentine's Day -

As Lisa and I tried to celebrate Valentine's Day on Saturday (nevermind the miserable results), we decided to just relax tonight and treat V-Day like a normal Tuesday, which is always the best time of the week. So with mixed results, moments of joy, moments of anger, frustration, we made our way through the evening.

This stuff is complex and frustrating. It's magnified because at any moment either of us may say to hell with it. Tonight was Lisa's turn. I wasn't ready to call it though. Which is sort of funny if you think of the Seinfeld episode where George's girlfriend won't let him break up with her (which was on tonight). But we're trying to get through it all. Please keep us in your prayers. Really each of the past few days has brought new challenges, new discussions, new frustrations, and another parting with everything okay and the future looking brighter.

Lisa got me a very sweet V-Day present by the way which will have an honored spot on my wall, while I got her flowers the other day, that have since been (understandably so) thrown away. Translation: Andrew + most things dealing with Lisa in past 4 days = terribly screwed up. This is unfortunately another example. I guess I did get right watching SATC with her tonight, which I know she appreciated, but it wasn't really a feel good episode. Now, I could never screw up interrupting her sleep (briefly) and kissing her goodnight, which I will do here in a few minutes.

Again, if you care, please pray that we will have direction and we'll be able to get through this. Thank you friends. Goodnight and good luck.

"And their answers lie in a setting sun"

Today was a good day. I talked with the right people about the right things who had helpful things to say.

I spent the evening with Rogers talking through some stuff and generally enjoying eachother's company. We even got a free meal from the Hacienda - gift certificate, for no apparent reason except Clemente likes us, and Lisa told him she'd rather her mom date him than the guy she's dating. For those of you who don't know, a somewhat humorous sidestory is that Clemente once offered Lisa free quesadillas for a lifetime if Lisa's mom went on a date with him. Unfortunately, Cathy never acquiesced. Believe it or not, I spelled that right on the first try. For those of you who don't know, I was a spelling bee champion in elementary school 1 year. Either 2nd or 4th grade. Becky Rosenberg quizzed me on word lists for what seemed like hours each day. My life sucked during those times.

The movie Final Cut takes place in the future where everything that one sees, is recorded and then at people's funerals a highlight reel is made into a 30 minute video and set to music so that people can reminisce. The movie was okay - but the idea was ingenious. Think about the funny things that happen to you everyday, that would be so funny on television or in a movie. Think about them and enjoy life. I try to write down some of the funny ones for my sitcom or movie script in the future. Will I write one? Probably.

"She makes so much sense when she says, 'Don't throw this away'"

What a weekend!

The best way to describe what has been going on in Bergland is to read these lyrics if you care...http://www.metrolyrics.com/lyrics/208009/Ben_Jelen/Falling_Down If you don't care than just imagine what my weekend was like. -
- or follow the timeline -
6 p.m. Friday - Buca De Bepos with family and close friends paid for by Aunt and Uncle as a wedding gift
10p.m. Friday - Cheap Thrills - too funny, esp. Nate's laughing when the rest of the auditorium was quiet
12a.m. Saturday - heading to Skate Night where Berg was "uninhibited" in the words of Shannon Sharp...in other words I had a hecka good time dancing on skates with my friends. If you've never seen Berg break it down on roller skates, you're missing out
3a.m. Saturday - IHOP with my SIFE friends, and Jon Ross, who has yet to convince me that he's not a spy from SAFE
5a.m. Saturday - head to Rogers with Valentine's flower to take my Saturday morning nap - go to sleep
11a.m. Saturday - wake up, watch Arrested Development, then shop with Rogers
4:30p.m. Saturday - head back to Rogers now dressed nicely for a Valentine's Date
4:30p.m. - 12:00a.m. Saturday - have a crappy meal and then watch more Arrested Development and Scrubs. Then leave to go to bed, drained.
12:30a.m. Sunday - head back to Rogers to deal with some issues that I have going on (see lyrics)
12:30a.m. - 3:00a.m. - deal with issues - then fall asleep
9:00a.m. Sunday - wake up decide not to go to church, go back to sleep
11:00a.m. Sunday - work on appropriately titled Saving Your Marraige Before It Starts workbook. Helpful stuff.
And on it went.
In summary, we had a rough weekend - very rough where we talked through a lot of stuff - lots of stuff. Wait until you get 120 days away from marraige. It's kind of scary.

One year to the day that I gave Lisa her engagement ring, she gave it back.

Twelve hours later--after a lot of tears and a lot of talking--I gave it back again.

In the end it came down to the simple facts:

• I love Lisa Ann Rogers very very much
• She loves me very very much
• I believe that she is the one for me
• We are supposed to get married
• Imagining life without her is not fun, not fun
• I needed a moment to be unstable - that moment has passed
• We will have a beautiful life together, like we've imagined and continue to imagine

So this isn't the end of the story. Hopefully, it's more towards the beginning 1/10 (since we've already been dating 7 years --- 63 to go). If you're reading this, thanks for being a friend. Thanks for being supportive. A special shoutout to Shannon. I love you guys, and I really believe that this will be a good life--for me & Lisa--for all of us--and I'm glad I have you all to go through it with.

"Isabell she treads so lightly"

Today was the day of firsts.

• 1st time I ever rode the AU Shuttle Bus - Sitting down on the shuttle bus for the first time, I felt like I was at the airport and heading on a vacation. It was a nice feeling. I might as well have been on a trip because I rode the dang thing about 3 times around campus (30 min. round trip) with Bex Firestone & Nat Webber. We were trying to go to Dairy Queen, but we didn't realize that we had to tell the driver until we'd been on the bus for about 35 minutes.
• 1st time I (or any other male) ever played the Saved by the Bell board game - and I won, which means I'm "The most popular girl in school, and the head cheerleader." It was a good game though.
• 1st time I've ever hung out with girls in the dorm. Martin Hall - good times with Bex, Nat, and Kimmy Coon (location of board game).
• 1st time I ever played well in a Rainbow Warriors b-ball game. 13 points. Not a bad game at all. It helped that Greg was kicked out for getting a tech. We are now 7 - 0.
• 1st time I've ever had my picture taken between two CEOs - both of the head honchos of our local hospitals. For a magazine article I'm writing.

So what else is on the agenda? Time to clean up and head to a movie with Ricky and Josh. Then a little reading before heading to bed. February 9, 2006 - another good day in Bergland.

Friday - Dinner out with Fam & Friends, Cheap Thrills, Skate Night

Saturday - Date with Rogers

Sunday - Cookout with SIFE for Mexico trip.

"It's more than I dare to think about"

Thirty minutes ago, I finished my pasta from last Friday and ate 10 pizza rolls. I had a craving for food so I ate. My breath is going to smell horrid tomorrow because of the pasta. I'll have to mask it behind something.

I'm tired right now, but still have to do my Org Behavior homework, which should take approximately 26 minutes from start to finish.

Wednesday nights this semester have been very fun. They begin with dinner with my "other" friends before heading to the "Other" Bible Study. Afterwards we retreat to the Lounge to play Halo for a couple of hours. "There's little better than playing Halo with females," as Cat Stevens implies. I would add to that, "Jared's trash-talking may be one of those few things that is better than playing with females."

So then, the "other" people generally leave while the regulars arrive to play another couple of hours of Halo. So my typical Wednesday nights are shot with "too much fun." This was a typical Wednesday night.

Saturday, Feb. 11 - Valentine's Date with Rogers
Saturday, Feb. 18 - Casino Trip for the day
Saturday, Feb. 25 - 2006 1st Annual SIFE Tennessee Bible 4-Wheeling Retreat featuring
Shantel O'Neal & Katherine Hinkley
Saturday, March 4 - Patty Rogers' College Game Night (you just might be invited)
Saturday, March 11 - Arrive in Mexico City
Saturday, March 18 - Sightsee in Mexico City after a week in San Luis De La Paz

Anyone else think this semester is going to fly by?

"All I can do is stay in this moment and feel alright"

I'm feeling a bit under the weather right now, as is Fiance Rogers. While she has a headache and just felt sick, I feel kind of sick and have a slight headache. No worries, we didn't get it from each other, as we haven't spent much time together outside of counseling yesterday. Counseling which is interesting, but I don't know if I would say it's going well. It's fun to talk through our issues, but apparently we have a few that we generally just kind of push to the side.

So life is going well. Some of my favorite moments recently have been hanging out with the other guys in the business department in classes and at some lunches. It's a pretty good group of guys.

Tomorrow morning I head back to Indy for a career fair. It should be interesting as there are like 100 companies there. I'm pretty tired, so I may be heading to bed pretty soon. Goodnight.

"The final countdown"

Thanks to Philip I'm listening to a song that makes me happy. The Final Countdown, which I would not care about if it wasn't for GOB - George Oscar Bluth, perhaps one of my favorite comedic characters of all time because of certain memorable things that he has done that make me laugh even now.

So the Rainbow Warriors have won their first 5 games now. There are 3 regular season games left to go and the team is looking better than ever. Unfortunately, this will have to be very short, as I have a bunch of homework to do the first of which is due in 8 hours. When I have no more homework, if that day comes, I will be happy.

"All are younger years"

Why do you think people make fun of me so much? I don't know if anyone realizes it, but you all are pretty much ruthless most of the time (it's only ruthless because some of it's true) about how I'm in SIFE and we're a "geek club" about me writing boring stuff on my Blog about me talking about basketball and Halo about my mother's faults about my "obsession" with Marilyn Monroe...etc. Well that was mainly just the list of "things I think about" according to Philip and Shannon, but ya'll do keep it up incessantly. Not a day goes by when I am being made fun of for being involved with SIFE. So why is that, I wonder. Philip even started "SAFE" simply because its a way to make fun of / satirize SIFE. There's no arguing with that. It's obviously true and to deny it would be lying.

My theory is three-fold:
1) I talk about the things I like / do
2) I put up with it by not defending myself, but laughing it off

So what do I do with this? Well, nothing probably, because let's face it, I like the attention.

Anyway, probably nothing most of the time. Sometimes I defend myself. Sometimes I make fun back (i.e.: it sure was fun when I made a comment about Shannon's family owning 30 cars* and her face immediately turning into a brief frown of anger before she was forced to laugh it off because that would be a similar way of me making fun of her as her making fun of me for loving SIFE - similar because both are true). *obviously 30 is an exaggeration (hince joking / making fun) however, the Sharps do have more than 3 cars, which is the # of people in family - thus a lot.

So I guess make fun of me at will. Our group dynamics would certainly have to change if I suddently took offense, and I like our group just the way it is.

Love,

Berg

"I have felt the same"

This Saturday started off very good with some good time with Rogers. We haven't speant more than 30 minutes alone together in almost two weeks, so it was nice to just relax and spend the afternoon together (and eat at Hacienda of course).

Tonight had been set aside to hang out with some of my "SIFE" or "other" friends watching some Saved by the Bell. It started out as a small group at 7:15. Before long Nate D. joined us and we headed off to the Roadhouse to be waited on by Katherine Q. Hinkley. Unfortunately, her tables did not open up until after 9:00 p.m. so we had a bit of a late and good dinner. Later we returned to the Lounge, played Halo and eventually watched a couple of episodes of SbtB before talking for a couple of hours. It was a good night.

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha"

Tonight I laughed harder than I ever have in my entire life. Harder than last Friday when I laughed very very hard. I felt like I might puke or die while I was laughing. Tears were streaming down my face. The Telephone Pictionary game certainly brings out the funny.

Another fun Friday night has come and gone. Perhaps I will take some pictures of the funniest pictures and post them for all times sake. Perhaps.

"With telescopes and dreams"

This week I've played the worst basketball of my entire life. Not a fun feeling. My confidence is down, with good reason, and basically, I suck. Well hopefully that will turn around. While I'm on the subject of bad things, I've also noticed that I am not very motivated to do things recently. I sit in class and have to talk myself into going to work instead of going home to take a nap. Is it lack of sleep? Is it senioritis? Only time will tell. Just one of those weeks, I guess.

In less than five months the following will happen (not in chronological order):

• I will get a job
• Lisa and I will find an apartment
• Lisa and I will get married at the Wedding of the Year: Rogers & Berg '06
• I will graduate from college with a bunch of my best friends, but not Josh
• We will celebrate the fact that its Friday by eating out and being friends 15 times
• I will spend a week in Mexico
• Novus Dux will sleep under a tent for 100 hours
• I will complete 16 years of school with no Bs that affected my GPA (hopefully)
• We will have a heck of a lot of fun as this chapter closes, the pages turn faster, but they're climatic
• I will purchase 10 more CDs
• I will watch 20 movies
• I will use the word poppycock at least 12 times, it is a synonym for drivel, which describes at leat half of this list - not the meaningful half

"I put a spell on you"

Well the interview seemed to be very successful from my perspective. As far as I can tell the company is interested in having me work for them. They said a few times, that they want to get some young people in. Plus, when I asked what they need to know about me the guy (hopefully my future boss) said that he goes by his "gut" usually. Basically, saying - I can tell that you would be a good person for the job. They spent more time trying to sell me on the company than I spent trying to sell myself. So hopefully, I'll keep in touch with them and get a job here in the next 4 - 6 weeks. Thank you for your prayers.

It's time to study for my first test of the 2nd semester, which is tomorrow at 11. I think I might take off chapel to study some more though - and get this: It's open note. Always a good thing.

Song of the Week: Strange and Beautiful - Aqualung